Sunday, April 13, 2008

The Rankings

I tried simplifying the rankings so that everyone would have an idea of what I am talking about. To be honest, I love beer. I realize there are perfect beers for perfect moments. You can sit at dinner and drink the perfect Thomas Hardy Ale of 1999 and declare it the finest beer ever, but the next day you can be sitting at Fenway and nothing will taste better than your $8 Bud Light. On to the rankings.

0 – It is either poisonous, non alcoholic or pretty much something where you'd rather say "Actually I am driving tonight" instead of drinking it.

1 – A last resort beer, you know, when it is the only thing available and the alternative is dealing with the current circumstances sober.

2 – The average beer. It is for when you are looking for something with more substance than style, generally your Bud Light and Miller Lite beers from the major brewers, which you are comfortable buying for a crowd and perfect for the nights when maybe one or two beers are not enough.

3 - A Solid beer. Most likely from the mid majors (Harpoon, Sam Adams) that maybe has a few more hops than your usual fair. It’s a beer that you may keep around the house so people think you are more “mature” and not that guy who had to have the funnel surgically removed after college.

4 – A knock your socks off good beer. The kind of beer you keep around the house for yourself, but keep away from the guests at parties. This is a beer you savor and tell your friends about.

5 – Hall of Famer. This is the beer that when you see it, you drop whatever you are doing and order it. It’s the stuff pharaohs are buried with. If your friends hate this beer, then you stop being their friend. It is that good.

3 comments:

Tom said...

How do we, the readers, submit suggestions? e.g. the best beer ever made by anyone anywhere anyhow?

My Own Worst Critic said...

Would it be possible to include rankings for well-known beers so we can get a sense of your taste (or lack thereof_?

Beer Crusade said...

I could do that, but I really only want to rank beers after I have tasted them. If I had to guess however, here goes:

0 - Miller Genuine Draft

1 - Iron City Beer

2 - Bud Light

3 - Sam Adams

4 - Dog Fish Head 90 Min IPA

5 - I'll let ya know