Samuel Adams Utopias, Boston Beer Co., Boston, MA

Let’s be honest, if you throw some barley and hops into something, we’re most likely to give it a try, but the Samuel Adams Utopias is a different kind of beast. Dropping $150 to $200 on 24 ounces of beer seems a bit ludicrous, but at a world record 27% ABV you have to be getting your money’s worth, right? That being said, I picked up the Utopias at a local liquor store, despite the shuddering of my bank account and chose to suffer this challenge for the benefit of you, the readers. I would like to point out that finding a bottle of Utopias in these parts would be considered a modern day Labor of Hercules, no one was carrying it, and if someone did have it, well they were talking $200. After being shut out of pretty much every reputable liquor store I can think of, I was hit by a proverbial lightning bolt and called upon the liquor store near my office that is best known for selling singles of PBR to the area transients. My thought process being, if they can only afford singles, I doubt they are dropping the cash for the Utopias. On a dusty shelf high above the cash register, there laid my Utopias.

I immediately hit the beer forums looking for suggestions on serving and storage. Unlike typical beers, the Utopias can be resealed, and thus does not need to be drunk in one sitting. In fact when the forum thought this was my plan several frantic posts about alcohol poisoning were posted. I mean I’m dumb, but I’m not dumb. Thankfully one of the posters suggested I read the tag on the beer and order the free (+ shipping & handling) Utopias glass that Sam Adams had made especially for the beer. I patiently waited for my glass and once it arrived I looked forward to Saturday.

On Saturday I gingerly opened the brew kettle shaped bottle, popped off the underlying cap. A quick whiff of alcohol followed by sugary sweet maple syrup aromas caught my olfactory senses. I nervously poured out 2 ounces of perhaps the most expensive drink ever into my Utopias glass. The absence of carbonation was quite noticeable. The reddish brown liquid filled about a third way up the glass. I lifted the glass to my lips and hesitated. I was 98% scared, 2% excited or maybe the other way around. The beer had stopped me in my tracks and I questioned whether I had put the Utopias too high on the pedestal. My wife eyed me with an air of suspicion with a bit of a grin. She could read my mind and when she saw my expression as I raised the glass and took my first sip, she whooped “You Hate It!” I can only haphazard to guess my expression; I surmise it resembled the look on Roger Rabbit’s face whenever he drank alcohol. My eyes bulged, my nostrils flared, my ears whistled and my bow tie spun. But my wife was wrong. My palette was just not used to the senses I had just inflicted upon myself. The malt, the hops, and the alcohol layered one on top of the other as if it had been put together by one of the Old Masters. The initial taste was like candied dry fruits, prunes, plums and raisins. The alcohol made a fiery passage through the mouth and up into your nose. The bitterness of the hops mimicked the bitterness you’d typically find in a wine as opposed to a beer. The viscosity of the Utopias resembled something too silky to be liquid. And let it be known the beer is GOOD.

I spent nearly 40 minutes with my Utopias, taking small sips here and there, in my life I doubt a beer has ever lasted that long once it had reached my clutches; I am not one to nurse a beer. During this time I pondered the rating for the Utopias and it definitely had me twisting and turning. I typically don’t like reviewing beers unless I have had a full 12 ounces to sample, to catch everything in 2 ounces is tough. Also I had a hard time thinking about the Utopias as a beer, its more cognac than beer. Alas, I found myself calling this a 4.0. The Utopias I feel is something you have to be in the mood for, and it’s something I feel I will occasionally sip, but only at the right time.

250 Anniversary Stout, Guinness Brewery, Dublin, Ireland

Amazing, isn't it? Guinness was celebrating the 250th anniversary of the founding of their St. James Gate brewery, and decided to use the momentous occasion to introduce a limited edition stout. Great idea, really. Too bad it seems like a lot of marketing and only a touch of brewing.

As you'd expect from a stout, the 250 Anniversary is nearly totally black, with a light brownish head. It tastes just like a Guinness, but with a bit more to the body, almost like the difference between 1% and 2% milk. The aroma is unremarkable and a bit lost, coming through in spots with roasted malts and coffee smells. It is a bit stronger than the usual Guinness stout at 5% ABV, but not really noticeable.

Here's the thing: from the company that is synonymous with "stout", I expect something really special for their 250th anniversary. Like liquid gold in stout form. This beer is not nearly that good. You'll never tell your kids, "I had a Guinness 250 Anniversary, once, and I'll never have a beer like that again." And that is why I'm highly disappointed in this one.

Does this beer suck? No, you can drink it and enjoy a decent, quality product. Is it special in any remarkable way, like something that would be suitable for a 250th anniversary? No way. It'd be like getting a Fudgie the Whale cake for someone's 100th birthday.

Rating = 2.0

Boont Amber Ale

So I moved recently, which is good and bad. Good because I'm in a new place in a great location, but bad because I'm leaving the best beer store ever behind. Sure I could make the half hour trip over, and I'm sure I will from time to time. But for now, I have to go exploring in my new neighborhood. Tonight brought me a nice new treat, Boont Amber Ale.

Brewed by the Anderson Valley Brewing Company in California, this beer... well this beer was basically a middle of the road beer. Nothing amazing about it, but nothing horrible about it either. Nothing that makes me regret buying the sixer, but nothing urging me to rush out and buy more.

At a rather pedestrian 5.8%abv, this beer doesn't pack much of a punch either. It did however pour a very healthy inch plus head and a great dark amber color. Everything about it was just.. okay. I feel like my fellow Beer Crusaders and I could have brewed this in our kitchen, so I'm going to give it an ordinary rating of 2.5. Like I said, nothing great, but nothing horrible.

India Pale Ale, Southampton Publick House Ales & Lagers, Southampton, NY

Looking out of the BC castle this weekend at the snow covered grounds, I was definitely hit with a tad of seasonal affective disorder, aka the winter blues for you guys not trying to busy yourself with big words. So when I opened my fridge I wanted a beer that would take me the way of summer and sun, and what better to do so than a beer from the Hamptons, Southampton Publick House India Pale Ale. The beer poured a frothy head with tiny little hop bobbles dotting the top. The coloring was a medium brown with an orange tinge and most importantly it smelled of beautiful hops. The Southampton hit me with a quick kick of bitter, that not only surprised me but dominated the malt. The hops definitely brought an apricot taste. The malt fought a good fight against the hops, but in the end the bitterness won out. Now, the Southampton wasn’t overly bitter to be disagreeable, but it had an edge that could have used a tad more hop balance. The 6.1% ABV is solid. As is the rating at a 3.0

By the way now that Jersey Shore has been renewed for Season 2, I wouldn’t be surprised to see Jersey Shore: Hitting the Hamptons on next year and The Situation holding court at the Southampton Publick House.

Urbock 23, Schloss Eggenberg, Austria

In Austria, bocks are normally available only around Christmas and Easter. On the day before I left Vienna, I spotted a double bock on the shelf at the grocery store and decided it was my destiny to give it a try. Urbock 23 is a doppelbock made by Schloss Eggenberg and is most well-known for its high alcoholic content of 9.6%ABV. In fact, the label on the back of the bottle describes the brew as "the Cognac of Beers." (Not to be confused with "the Champagne of Beers," which is something else entirely.) The Urbock 23 is surprisingly light and clear in color with a subtle creamy flavor. For a high alcohol content beer, it is incredibly smooth. For this aspect, it earns my highest rating yet, a 4.5. If you're not careful, you could down a a bottle too many and end up wondering where you left your pants. I've always been partial to Belgians, but after the Urbock 23, I'm going to start keeping my eye out for double bocks.

The Mission, 724 Huntington Ave, Mission Hill, Boston, MA

So the other day, I was in the city and decided to meet Pale Ale Guy for a drink. Unfamiliar to the particular section of the city, I used an IPhone application to pick the bar closest to where I was going to be and lo and behold it spit out The Mission, in Mission Hill, a neighborhood of Boston. The bar is very non-descript on the outside and was sparsely filled when I arrived on a late, lazy weekend afternoon.

Pale Ale Guy was already waiting at the bar and we had our pick of seats. I picked a seat with no taps in front of it and sat down to look at the beer menu. Immediately I was surprised. They had a beer selection of over 80 beers broken out by style, a very impressive list for a place that is pretty small to be carrying such a supply of bottled and draught beers. I went with a Flashback Brown from Boulder Brewing and sat back to enjoy.

As I mentioned, the bar wasn’t overly crowded, but I’d have to say the bar service was top notch. The bartender was knowledgeable on all beers served, was able to make suggestions based on my whims for the afternoon, and allowed me some small samples of the draught beers I was thinking about ordering, as well as some samples of things the staff thought I might like. When you have bartenders like this, it makes for an easy afternoon and you can really put down the beer list and let the bartender take care of you. Since moving to Boston, I have found these kinds of interactions with bartenders rare. Typically you have to build a longstanding relationship with a bartender to earn the perks Pale Ale Guy and I were getting, but I have found that in beer bars you are more likely to have these situations, especially if you are willing to take risks, speak somewhat intelligently about beer, and not order some mass market popular beer.

My only negative thoughts about The Mission are, I wish they would list Brewer, ABV and size of beer on their beer menu and the fact our bartender ended their shift without closing out with us and receiving the benefit of our appreciation. Of course once the bartender closed out so did we, as we enforced Vegas rules, when you’re on a hot streak with a dealer, you close out when they do.

In summation, if you are in Boston and looking for a good beer bar, I would definitely suggest you swing by The Mission. They have trivia Sunday nights and seem to be quite busy on weekend nights. The food was good and if I were to rate my experience on the beer scale I'd give it easily a 4.5.

It's been awhile since we've done a beer bar review, and we should do more of them, but after our experience at The Mission and the fact Eileen posted on Monday giving me a good excuse to skip my posting duties for Monday, I thought I'd contribute a bar review.

Sierra Nevada: Torpedo Extra IPA

Once upon a time there was a guy, and this guy loved him some hops. Then one day, this guy found Sierra Nevada Torpedo and lived happily ever after, the end.

Good story huh... I happen to know that guy and know for a fact that this beer was really quite very good. It really should come as no huge surprise though, Sierra Nevada tends to put out a consistently above average product. Matter of fact, I've only had one beer of theirs I didn't like, and that was the Christmas brew, about five years ago. I'm convinced I just got a bad batch or something though.

Some IPA's sacrifice the taste just so they can say they have "twice the hops", or whatever, but this beer does nothing of the sort. Very smooth tasting for an extra hoppy beer, so much so that although the hops are the dominant flavor, they're not the only flavor. It's scent is what you'd expect from an IPA, citrus-y, but it's not overly done. Really, this is one of the best extra IPA's I've had in a long long time.

If you're looking for some extra hops, try the Torpedo. I'm going to give it a 4, which may sound high, but trust me, you'll agree after tasting it for yourself. And at 7.2%abv, that doesn't exactly hurt it's cause.